Close or not to Close this blog that is the question and the threat if I don't use this app before February 9th 2018. So I am using it. 

Left Behind

2010 was one of the hardest years I had been through in my life,  I thought perhaps raising a child on my own would top the list of things I've endured in my lifetime. I have been through a large number of ups and down through out my life that you would think by now I would be used to it, but you never get used to set-backs and disappointments, you dread them like the plague and wish you where never born to go through it all, but the toughest is yet to come.

 At the end of August my almost 3 years of being back in Tennessee will finally be over with, but it doesn't really end there, it continues on, for at this point and time I find that after all I have endured and thinking that things will go great, I find that they really aren't going to go well for me the way I had hoped they would. I will be at the end of August be on my own, without a home, or a job, yes I will be sent packing, the house will be closed up, the man I was a live-in caregiver has been re-located to California to live in a long-term care home, I on the other hand will not be so lucky, and what comes to mind is this, for the almost 3years I have been here I have felt alone, hardly anyone called to see how I was, only on a rare occasion was I in contact with any of my friends, some I have known for over 30 years, even bothered but only twice to contact me, and that was via Skype, I tried to keep in-touch with them but found that they weren't to concerned about how I was or what affects this had on me, they really just wanted to go on with their lives, in fact one of them said that since you've been back there it's almost as if you had died, I just don't think about you that much, WOW anyone hear the slap in the face?

I really thought that I was cared about more than I thought I was, but it just seem to be the opposite. So at the end of August I will indeed find myself living out of a backpack somewhere still in the state of Tennessee. At that point I will have lost everything, the dogs, bird, and all my belongings I had hope to hang onto until I found a job and could move into my own place, but without a job, you cannot pay for things. Not to mention what affect this will have on my son, who is living in Oregon.

I didn't know what forum to post this on, FaceBook, or here and I chose here, because I felt that after all these years that the bloggers I got to know over time would be supportive even though I have only met a few of you in person.

I do not know what tomorrow will bring, and I have prayed till my heads falling off.

Thanks for listening, or reading this, it's not the full story, but you get the jest.

French Dome Cathedral

It's been awhile since my last post here and I thought what better time to share with those still in BlogLand then this time of year. I do come to my blog from time to time just to see who is still around and who has left the blogging community and I am so happy when I see a lot of the people I got to know from the beginning of my blogs. 

Christmas time for some is a time of reflection of the year and to be happy and joyful with our family and friends and for some it's a tragic time. Not everyone celebrates or wishes to celebrate this Holiday and that's okay, for some it brings back sadness and loneliness, it could be a anniversary of someone's death or the reminder that loved ones are gone or you're away from home and no one around to celebrate the holiday with, I think we all need to reflect on the joy this season brings us and extend that joy to someone in need or to contact someone we have not seen or spoken to for perhaps months or years, this is a time to put aside any hard feelings. 

With the busyness of this time of year we forget to stop and think about those without jobs or those with families that are struggling to cope, put yourself in there shoes for a moment and think about how it would be to not be able to celebrate this season or be able to give your loved ones a small gift, it would be hard wouldn't it? 

So in closing I ask you to reflect, share and think of others. 

Have a Happy Holiday Season

Merry Christmas 

and Goodwill towards others.

Still In The Land of The Living

I know, I know it's been a bit since I posted here on my blog. For anyone interested, Yes, I am still around. I pop in occasionally and check in on a few blogs from time to time too. I have noticed a lot of changes with Blogger since I was last here. It's like learning all over again how to even post this.
So, anyway, I am still in Tennessee where I am still a caregiver to a friends dad that had a stroke in 2010. But hopefully my time here is drawing to a close. I don't wish to remain here much longer. Being a full-time caregiver is a thankless job from my point of view, mainly because the man that I'm here for is very ungrateful that he's still alive, is able to still live in his home with his pets, and go out to be with friend three times a week. But angry that someone remains living here full-time with him. He is experiencing the early signs of Dementia and it isn't easy.
As for myself I am occupying my time here with an online College course in Criminal Justice, with the hope someday I will become a Paralegal. I have till June 2013 to complete my Associates Degree, so I do have something that keeps be busy.
For my son, he's still attending the University of Southern Oregon, in Ashland and is really enjoying living there. His plan is to Graduate in 2013 with a Bachelors Degree in Physic's.
My two little poodles are still in California with a friend, she has her hands full with them and two other dogs and twelve cats. I miss them terribly and want to see them.
So in closing I wish everyone good health and thanks for stopping by occasionally.

It's Been Eons And I Wanted To Share Something

Hello strangers. Yes, it is me. I've been away for so long and felt it time to come back for a brief moment and say hello to everyone in Blog Land.


I thought I'd share something with all of you. There are times in our lives when we believe and it is mostly a cynical point of few that there are not many kind people left in the world that truly appreciate you.

I've been for the last 7 months in a caregiver position for a friends father that suffered a stroke back in August 2010. It's not been an easy position to be in, since he does not appreciate me being here etc.... But his family does and that's where the kindness comes into play with my story.

I've know my friend for 22 years now and met nearly everyone in her family with the exception of her youngest brother. When I came back to Tennessee to start the caregiver position for them I met him. It was a brief encounter and he was leaving to go back home in a few days so I never got to know him well, until January, when he came back for 7 weeks to do some work. After leaving we have spoken almost daily to share what his dad is doing and how well. While he was here he noticed I was having trouble with my laptop and he offered to have it fixed if I decided I wanted to. I told him no, I was willing to put up with it and we left it at that.

Well to my surprise, he decided to do one better for me and purchase a new laptop for me. I was taken back by this kindness, I am not use to having someone wanting to do this for me and I told him it was not necessary, but he insisted that I have a new one, it was his way of saying thank you for putting up with their father, because his father is not a very easy man to put up with.

He truly is a very nice guy, now I know why I never met her brother before. She was saving the best for last.

7 Years To This Day

Maxine

My mother died this day 7 years ago. Sometimes you get caught up in everyday life and you forget about the ones you love. You go on, but you can't forget. This morning is different for me because of where my life is today. Some, say you are were you are in life because it's meant to be. I don't always buy that reasoning.

For what it's worth today, I wish I were back in California to be around the people I love and have been around when times were tough.

My mother always smiled when you walked in the door, and always greeted you with a good morning, or good afternoon, and good evening when she answered the phone. I miss our talks when I needed to tell someone, how I was feeling. That is one thing that you miss, is calling her and telling her your day or just to say hello and see how she's doing. 

It's a day of remembrance for me and if the weather holds and doesn't rain anymore today, I'll be out walking for you today mom.

I love you momma.

Announcing !!!!

http://selldirecttoyou.blogspot.com/

This is an experiment of selling some of my things, that are in storage.

My first item is a Silverplated  Salad Serving Set. WM.A Rogers AA, that comes with Tarnish Sleeve, that has additional slots for other pieces.


Tell me what you think.

I did this before I knew I could be going out of state. I am now in Tennessee for 2 months taking care of a friends father that had a stroke in August. So, I am sorry if your interested in this and will not be able to do any transactions etc...... I still have the pieces but their in storage and it's in Calif. and I am here. But thanks to those that were interested and inquired about them. 

Son Off To College

Perhaps you have seen his picture on my righthand sidebar. My son Ricky, is now attending Southern Oregon University. It will be the first time he's living away from home.

What's great is I can still see and talk to him with the use of "Skype. And what a great tool and invention that has become.

He's endured the turmol from the loss of our home and everything else we've been through together.

I have been a single mom most of his life and he's turned out to be a great son.

I wish him luck and success in his studies and in life.


Love you,

MOM

I Could Use Some Prayers

I have a second Interview with a Doctor that I have done a Preliminary interview with a few weeks back.

My request is for prayer. I need this job so badly and it's for only a few days a week, but it's a start. 

I know the blogger community is strong with those that believe in the power of prayer. Please join me in praying for this opportunity to open up for me to get back into the work force.


Thank you all.

7F80D116-D830-26A7-3FCA-C781CC286168

1.03.01

Where Did Everyone Go ?

I remember when I first started blogging. It was by accident really. I was looking at a blog after looking up Romantic Homes. Looking for decorating ideas. I found My Romantic Home, you know it as Cindy's.

Now that I've been away for awhile, and curious about what I've been missing, I see a lot of my favorite blogs have not been blogging all that much, some not for months and some even a year. It's a sad thing. But there are many that still remain and I am happy about that. 

Blogging can be a joy and a curse at the same time. 

Some day I return full force and continue to check in as well.

Why Do We Celebrate The 4th Of July

Most people in the United States celebrate the 4th of July, but do you know exactly why the holiday is so important to our country? Imagine how you would feel if someone older than you (maybe an older sister or brother) kept telling you what to do all of the time and kept taking more and more of your allowance. That is how the colonists felt in the years leading up to 1776. Great Britain kept trying to make the colonists follow more rules and pay higher taxes. People started getting mad and began making plans to be able to make their own rules. They no longer wanted Great Britain to be able to tell them what to do, so they decided to tell Great Britain that they were becoming an independent country. (To be independent means to take care of yourself, making your own rules and providing for your own needs.)

The Congress met in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and they appointed a committee (a group of people working together to do a specific job) to write a formal document that would tell Great Britain that the Americans had decided to govern themselves. The committee asked Thomas Jefferson to write a draft (first try) of the document, so he worked for days, in absolute secret, until he had written a document that he thought said everything important that the committee had discussed. On June 28, 1776, the committee met to read Jefferson's "fair" copy (he put his best ideas together and wrote them neatly.) They revised (made some changes) the document and declared their independence on July 2, 1776. They officially adopted it (made it theirs) on July 4, 1776. That is why we call it "Independence Day." Congress ordered that all members must sign the Declaration of Independence and they all began signing the "official" copy on August 2, 1776. In January of the next year, Congress sent signed copies to all of the states.

The Declaration of Independence is more than just a piece of paper. It is a symbol of our country's independence and commitment to certain ideas. A symbol is something that stands for something else. Most people can look at a certain little "swoosh" and know that it stands for "Nike." Well, the signers of the Declaration of Independence wanted the citizens of the United States to have a document that spelled out what was important to our leaders and citizens. They wanted us to be able to look at the Declaration of Independence and immediately think of the goals we should always be working for, and about the people who have fought so hard to make these ideas possible. The people who signed the Declaration risked being hanged for treason by the leaders in Great Britain. They had to be very brave to sign something that would be considered a crime! So every time we look at the Declaration of Independence, we should think about all of the effort and ideas that went into the document, and about the courage it took for these people to stand up for what they knew was right -- independence!


Read the Declaration of Independence

The Move Is Over

 

I sold the house and have moved out. A short sale avoided a foreclosure. It was hell moving out. You never know all you have till you move. And collecting over the years hadn't helped either. One thing I did learn was that I need to go to the storage and get rid of more things. But instead of just donating I need to sell some things. I have things I know I can sell. 

It was exhausting work. I had friends helping but it took it's toll on all of us. I had so many bruises in places I didn't think it could happen and wondered just how I got some of them.

Now the downside to this all. I am still looking for work, and have no permanent home. I am in fact living in a Residence Inn. It's too expensive to stay here for much longer. 

The three things I need and pray for are, a car, job and a home to live in. I am even considering re-locating out of state for a cheaper place to live other than living in high priced California. My son leaves for College in September for Oregon, so why should I not take that opportunity to do something as well ?

Thank you to those that still come by once in awhile to check in. I do hope that someday I will be back to blogging or at least using the blog to sell things.

God's Cake

God's Cake

This is about the best thing I've ever read as an explanation. We all wonder many many many times over WHY?

Sometimes we wonder, "What did I do to deserve this?" or "Why did God have to do this to me?" Here is a wonderful explanation! A daughter is telling her Mother how everything is going wrong, she's failing algebra, her boyfriend broke up with her and her best friend is moving away.

Meanwhile, her Mother is baking a cake and asks her daughter if she would like a snack, and the daughter says, "Absolutely Mom, I love your cake."

"Here, have some cooking oil," her Mother offers.
"Yuck" says her daughter.
"How about a couple raw eggs?" "Gross, Mom!"
"Would you like some flour then? Or maybe baking soda?"
"Mom, those are all yucky!"

To which the mother replies: "Yes, all those things seem bad all by themselves. But when they are put together in the right way, they make a wonderfully delicious cake! "

God works the same way. Many times we wonder why He would let us go through such bad and difficult times. But God knows that when He puts these things all in His order, they always work for good! We just have to trust Him and, eventually, they will all make something wonderful!

God is crazy about you. He sends you flowers every spring and a sunrise every morning.
Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He can live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart.

If you like this, send this on to the people you really care about.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.

 

Final Post

So I am making this my final post. It's been harder and harder to do any posting on either of my blogs, and it has become painful to do a post. It's not fun anymore and I have nothing to post about any longer. The memories are here of when times were better and it just makes it harder and harder as time goes on.

I enjoyed the time I did it. Sometimes it was frustrating, mostly in the beginning, but now more than ever. I've enjoyed even meeting some bloggers in person, again in better times.

Things in my life have changed, and not for the better, so, I just feel it's time to say goodbye.

I won't close the blog completely, I'll keep it up, I just won't post anything to it from this day forward.

I appreciate all your comments over the last few years. And may check in from time to time. Over the next few months. My home is now in foreclosure so, I will probably after a few months no longer be able to do that. My car was repossessed, so I won't be living in that, who knows where I'll be in a few months.

So, farewell dear bloggers.

Agencies For Haiti's Relief

http://www.womensconference.org/haiti-earthquake-relief-how-you-can-help/

Here you'll find a list of Agencies that are helping in the relief effort for Haiti. Such devastation, it's hard to realize. As you Californian's know all to well, Earthquakes can change your life in only a few seconds.

And for anyone else's that's ever been through a natural disaster it's hard to come back from it without some type of trauma. Can you imagine in a Third World  extremely poor country just how much harder it well be ? We are still trying to recover from Hurricane Katrina, it will be even harder for them.

If you can help, go to the list on this link.

Ancestry

I've been keeping myself busy. I started doing my Family Tree in 2003, the year my mother died. I was always asking her questions and she was always telling me information about our family, I'm sure in hopes that I would retain this information for future use. Stored somewhere in the Ancestry file in my brain. Well for the most part I do remember a lot of what she told me. I use, Ancestry.com for my information. I just can't believe what a genuine amount of information I get from it.

What I was not prepared for, was the amount of marriages, and re-marriages, and even more re-marriages. I got to thinking why so many ?. Then it dawned on me. Those were tough times, and people did not live as long as today. Women died in childbirth, men died of heart attacks, etc....

The majority of my family were farmers. And as with many, had a LOT of children to help with the farming. My mother was born to a farmer and I remember her saying she was worked like a boy. She and her twin sister were the first born of her family, so not only was she worked in the fields, she was also expected to take care of the younger children when they came along. To help raise them as well, because mothers in those day's worked long hours as well in the fields and barns.

My father was born to a Well Driller. Now I understood how he knew to drill the well we had. He drilled it around the late 70's and it amazed me just how long it took and that he knew what he was doing.

The other information I get from looking into my Genealogy is, I have cousins and distant cousins I never knew about, and were there all along.

I've even discovered, I have some pretty famous relatives as well, although they are mostly distant cousins, 4th, 5th, and even 8th cousins.

My heritage goes, back to as early as the 1600's. Coming from France, England, Ireland, Scotland, and possibly Germany. We also, have Indian thrown there from somewhere. But can't remember if it's Cherokee or Apache , or ???.

But it can keep me busy, in between emailing I don't know how many Resume's by now, so to not get to crazy. Looking through family picture's discovering the Uncle you never knew you had, but was grateful for the person who wrote on the back of it, just who he was, and not a former boyfriend of your mothers.  

So, that's what I've been up to.

Still need your thoughts and prayers.

A Shiny New Year

Christmas Hope

Hello everyone. I just wanted to say Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all those that have stopped by and left comments and those who just love to stop by.

This year started out well for me. Things were good and troubles were few. But as the year progressed things changed. As with some of you, I know you can relate. We have some troubled times.

But in the troubled times, there are ray's of hope. Some of you have sent me emails asking if you can help. It was not my intention to post about my troubles to solicit help, but none the less, some of you felt compelled to do so, and for that I am grateful. Sending a little of something was welcomed.

I will not mention those that did help, as requested, but you know who you are. My hope for you is that you get what you gave, back ten fold.

We all need HOPE in the remainder of the year and for the future, it's what we live on most of the time, hoping that something will change, I am one.

I appreciate all your prayers and emails of encouragement, it means a lot.

So, in closing Happy Holidays, and Peace be with you all.

There's Always Another One

Well I didn't get the job I interviewed for. I even went back for a working interview. But was told via email, that the  Dr. had alread filled the position.

I know there's another one out there, I just wish it would come sooner than later.

Thanks again for all the kinds emails, and the prayers. Please continue.

I Am Still With The Living

I miss being on the internet, so much that I  get all kinds of thoughts going through my head when I can't get on. Like where can I go, and who's computer or internet can I borrow.

And I mean legally. I have a friend that lets me use hers and I go to the library and can use theirs as well for free, gotta Love the Library.

So, I have been on a few interviews lately and had one working interview. So, it's always a waiting game. When you haven't worked for some time you get rusty.

I've worked in the Dental Field in the Front office  position for over 25+ years and although things haven't changed a great deal, there are some things that have.

I am not one to give up, but sometimes you just get worn out thinking about everything and what to do to get yourself out of hot water.

I have given up a lot. Mainly because I can't afford to pay the bill, so things get turned off. No, TV, or internet. Phone service disconnected, and cell phones being turned off. I have changed my phone number on my resume so many times, I don't remember who I gave the correct number to.

I have good days and bad days, I like the good days better.

I don't know how much longer I'll be in my home, It's the hardest part of it all. I've lived here with my son for over 10 years, and it was the home we have been in the longest. I will try to do what I can, but without a job, it's pretty much out of my hands. The only thing to do is a short sale.

So, there you are not much change, but trying to make change it is not easy.

I still need all your prayers.

And thank you all for your kind words and your offers of prayer.

Till next time.